First 38

I always knew that suicide was wrong. Even though I didn’t fully understand the Bible I knew that was not the thing to do. I cried silently and finished up what I was doing. I went and sat in the bathroom. I felt like the worst person on earth. My nose hurt and my arm was hurting from the burns. I never said anything because no one would believe me anyway. I left the bathroom and attempted to go to the closet and sit like I was supposed to. In the complete darkness. But when I came out the bathroom I got beaten. I didn’t know why but I did. Why did you sneak my cookies? I answered I didn’t. I hit beat again. I often asked myself why do I even reply. It doesn’t matter. Afterwards I went to my room. I sat up in the corner of the bunk bed and just talked to myself. I cried a lot silently. I was up all night. The next day it was time for school. As I got dressed I my mom asked what happened to my nose. I couldn’t tell her. I stain the bunk Ed bar hit my nose. We got on the bus and school was my sanctuary. At lunch I would meet Noah outside and we would sit and talk. And eat together he was so nice. When we got home Lidia told that I was talking to boys in school. That was a bad thing. I got called in the living room by Harvey. How was school? It was ok. Who did you talk to? Nobody. I stood there quietly. ” I told you that no one will want you right! Yes. You don’t talk to boys understand. Yes I went to my room. …..